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Oh how badly I keep on singing and humming the tune of your
songs in my head over and over but I never seem to get over you.
You were my favorite, you were the one who I turned up to when
Oh how badly I keep on singing and humming the tune of your songs in my head over and over but I never seem to get over you. You were my favorite, you were the one who I turned up to when nobody understood me. You probably didnt even know if I existed or not. But I loved you. I could feel you. Every word you said was embedded in my heart in my veins. Its in me like my blood, I only knew one thing that I needed no drugs no cigarette, no alcohol to really feel you enjoy the connect I felt in your songs.
I knew you were in a war, with your own self.
I am so disheartened now as a kid I wanted a tattoo of your name, I told my mom hey ma I want his name on my vein, she smiled and said one day you can be like him, you were my inspiration I wanted to once see you in real life and hold your hands and thank you for saving my life every time, every fucking time I was down every time my demons tried to overpower me I make them hear you. Your songs had more power than anything, and it was like a chant, the moment I heard you sing my soul was at peace my demons ran away they felt small shallow and ashamed to be with me. My demons were powerless then.
You know we all have our demons they live with us but you know we are more powerful than they are. They are nothing in front of us. Because nothing really matters and this is not me saying, rather u are the one who taught me this. My soul screams for the pain it goes through. Now that I know I will never be able to hear u again. Never be able to rejoice on your songs.
My mind hurts, every thought of you keeps reminding me that you are not here anymore,
Tell me where do I send u a fan mail?
How do I reach out to you have become intangible, but believe me u are immortal in my heart.
You know what I will still get that tattoo, still write to your family, still listen to your songs n play them over and over till I fall asleep and tired and forget the fact for the night that you are no longer with us.
But alas in the end it doesnt even matter.