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1.Pythagoras, Greek Mathematician, around 575 -500 B.C.
Yes, this is the guy who came up with the Pythagorean theorem we
all learned in school ("The square of the hypote...
Yes, this is the guy who came up with the Pythagorean theorem we all learned in school ("The square of the hypotenuse of a right triangle is equal to the sum of the square of the other two sides").
Apart from this pillar of trigonometry, Pythagoras was the first high-profile academic to insist that natural phenomena could be explained mathematically (paving the way for the study of Physics) and was even a major inspiration for Plato's theories of democracy. So, yeah, we can thank him for, like, half of the good things ever invented.
Much like L. Ron Hubbard and David Koresh, Pythagoras founded his own religion. Much like L. Ron Hubbard and David Koresh, Pythagoreanism was totally insane. How insane? To put it concisely, the square of the insanity of Pythagoreanism is equal to the sum of the square of the insanity of other religions.
Pythagoras' religion had two primary tenets: souls are reincarnated, and beans are evil. Not metaphorical beans, or metaphysical beans, but just plain, edible beans.
2.Lord Byron, English Poet, 1788-1824
Widely considered second only to Shakespeare in English poetry, Lord Byron published his first poetic work at 14, an age when our most profound thought was that girls might possibly be more awesome than video games. Renowned for his wit and versatility, Byron's Don Juan remains one of the few poems most of us can name when trying to seduce drunk English majors.
It began when Byron arrived at Cambridge, where he was ordered to send his dog back home as keeping one was against school rules. Desperate for a pet, Byron scoured college policies for an animal not expressly forbidden. He found no reference to bears.
The bear stayed with Byron in his dorm room. Being a responsible pet owner, Byron took it on regular leashed walks through the university, terrifying fellow students and lecturers. When asked by administration what purpose the bear served on campus, the poet tried in vain to get his beast a fellowship.