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Yesterday, I lost a friend. Suddenly and with the finality that
comes with death. He was taken in a bike accident in the wee hours
of the morning on his ride back home from work. Much too soon
Yesterday, I lost a friend. Suddenly and with the finality that comes with death. He was taken in a bike accident in the wee hours of the morning on his ride back home from work. Much too soon and certainly much too young. He left behind his mother and his wife of one year. Though we may not have been close over the years, we studied in school together, we graduated together. We have enough of a bond for his death to shock me and leave me feeling bereft.
Early last month, my father lost his elder brother. I lost an uncle. Though he was sick for a long time and his death was a release for him, it was a tragic and painful loss for my family and myself. My dad, especially. He lost his brother. His sibling. A person with whom he shared the better half of his life. My uncle's death was no less tragic than the loss of my friend. One was prolonged agony and one was sudden and swift. But, loss. Nonetheless.
In the aftermath of both these deaths, I couldn't help but wonder - how do we process death and loss? The loss of a family member, a friend or an acquaintance even? Death is by no means kind. Certainly not to the living. It is shocking and painful and devastating. How does the mind process such pain? When my uncle passed, I saw that my father and his other siblings dwelt on his life before his illness. Their memories of him as a healthy, happy man. Their memories of him as their brother, as a son, as a father, as a husband. And I realized, yes. That is how we process loss. We remember happy times, good times and moments that we spent with the person we lost and his or her impact on our lives.
For me, the sudden demise of my friend made me rethink some aspects of my life. Probably the swiftness with which he was taken made me realize that no one plans for death. We take life for granted. But there are no certainties. None whatsoever. The nature of life itself is fleeting. We do not want to consider the truth that is death.
But ask yourselves these questions - if you were to die tomorrow, would your family know how much you love them? If you were to die tomorrow, would your children know what they mean to you? If you were to die tomorrow, would your spouse know how much you love and appreciate him or her? If you were to die tomorrow, would your friends know who they are and what they mean to you? If you were to die tomorrow, what would you change today?
Life gives us many opportunities. Whichever deity you may believe in, grants you a new day every morning. Are you thankful? Or are you taking everything and everyone for granted?
Tell your parents, wife, husband, children, friends and family that you love and cherish them. Today. Everyday. We have time for everything in this world, would it hurt to take out a minute or two and tell your mother you love her? Would it hurt to call up that long lost friend you fought with and mend bridges? Would it hurt to hug your children and remind them that they mean the world to you?
When you are gone, what will people remember about you? Will it be good and will it make them smile? Life is fleeting time is flying by. Make the people who matter to you feel their worth and their importance. Before it's too late and you're gone and there was so much left unsaid.
I am going to tell the people I love, I love them everyday!